Of Fall, Brains, Hobbies & Ink

I know, this is late. It’s been “a week” already, and last weekend was busy too.

Fall is here, and inexplicably, our desire to get some yard work done kicked in this past weekend. Although it was probably more a sense of panic than anything else – as in, I bought a bunch of bulbs awhile back and really needed to get them in the ground. We spent a good portion of Sunday planting 200 bulbs, and still have quite a few left to plant next weekend. I sure hope the work pays off next spring.

Weekends are seriously not long enough for both yard and housework. I think that’s why fall/winter are my favorite seasons. Frozen ground and snow means no yard work and an excellent reason to stay inside. I might feel differently if weekends were four days long…

Actually though, it’s more cerebral than that. My husband and I were talking this weekend, and we’ve both had a lot more mental challenges at work lately (“lately” meaning most of the past year). Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing (though I think we could both use a good vacation), but it does leave a lot less brain power for anything outside of work. Halloween is normally our “Christmas”, but this year we’ve both been so distracted and busy that we’re not even doing much in the way of yard decor…our normally elaborate decorations are scaling way back to nearly sedate, just because neither of us have enough energy to deal with it (or even think about it, really).

My writing has really suffered as well, unfortunately. I’m still getting words down semi-regularly, but it’s not nearly as easy this year, and the publishing part – editing, formatting, cover art, distribution, promotion – it’s all just…way, way on the back burner because I have no mental space to even think about it, much less do it. I did have sort of a “crisis of faith” with regards to my writing abilities (no need to try to make me feel better on that one – if I know you even a little, I won’t believe you anyway, sorry!) for a good chunk of the year as well, which contributed, but using more brain power at work is definitely one of the main issues in how far behind on the whole writing/publishing front I am.

Alas, life goes through seasons just as nature does, and things will not always be this hectic.

I’ve been thinking too about how it’s so easy for hobbies to turn into obligations. The writing and it’s inherent obligations notwithstanding, I have stacks of comic books to catch up on, books half read and not even started, stamps everywhere that are waiting patiently to be cataloged, a sock that would require about 2 hours of my time (maybe less) to finish knitting, and sweater not even a quarter done in crochet, and while none of these things are necessary, important, or something anyone but me cares one iota about, somehow, I feel like I’m “failing” by not getting them “done”.

Why is that, I wonder? I mean, they’re my hobbies. Their whole purpose is to entertain me when I have the time/inclination to be entertained. They aren’t obligatory activities like work or housework, no one is waiting on me to finish any of them (as I said, writing notwithstanding), and they aren’t hurting anything by just sitting around waiting (okay, I may eventually be buried alive when the stacks of comics or prose topple over…or I suppose suffocation by yarn is entirely possible as well). So why do I feel like they’re just one more thing on the to-do list? Things I genuinely enjoy (which includes all of these things) should not feel like obligations. And I know it’s my own perception that makes them feel that way…I just don’t know how to change it.

Of course when I finally get that vacation I’ve been whining about? I fully plan to spend half of each day writing, and the other half with my nose buried in fiction someone else wrote. At least until I get to the bottom of Mt. Super/Anti-Hero.

I like to work on fiber arts (crochet & knitting) at night while watching TV. But I’m still suffering from the delusion that says if I have my laptop in my lap, I will Get Stuff Done. Important Stuff, like publishing and promo and web site updates and…

Yeah. It doesn’t happen. But every night, I delude myself into thinking it will, instead of just closing the laptop and migrating to the floor with the dogs and my latest yarn project. The grand irony is, I’d probably get more done if I just left the laptop closed, watched TV, played with the dogs, played with yarn, and *let my brain rest* for a few hours – away from the constant stimulation of news feeds and virtual conversations. Then late at night when I finally plug back into the matrix, so to speak, I’d be refreshed and ready to do…stuff.


On a completely different subject, as you can see, I got my tattoo/cover-up done last week, and it’s gorgeous. Well, not so much right now, because it’s healing and peeling and generally shedding like a real snake would, but it was beautiful right after it was done, and it will be again in another week or so. I love it. Andrew Hauck is the artist with Ghosts of Grace Tattoo Collective – http://ghostsofgracetattoo.com, and I’m going to have him do more work for me next year – I love his style and his philosophy with regards to tattooing and art. Good stuff.

Tomorrow, I have to pay my blood debt to the insurance company in order to keep getting my insurance free through work, which is annoying for a lot of reasons, the least of which is not being able to have my late night snack and tea, or my early morning tea tomorrow. *sigh* Mornings are hard enough, but navigating one without tea or food is just torture.

Tonight, however, there was steak. And wine. Mmm…wine…

And yes, a workout later. New body art is a great motivator for me to keep working towards a “better shape”!

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